I want this.

I need this gum. Now. Somebody please find it for me. Please.



Here's one of the scriptures.



Three questions:
-What does this have to do with gum?
-Does the gum taste like Jesus?
-WHERE CAN I GET THIS?!

Also these - "True Love Waits" sweatpants, printed on the butt.


And my all time favorite, which I'm going to buy as soon as I deposit my paycheck:

"JESUS SAVES" PIGGY BANK. Get it? 'Cause it's a pun. 'Cause he saves, and now literally too. UGH.

Here's a song, because I'm "Too Excited" for this kitschy crap.
Tilly and the Wall - Too Excited: Download
Get it? I need sleep.


Last minute addition: [This is all text from the website. I couldn't write this if I tried.]

If there were a fight between the Terminator and Moses, who do you think would win? How about The Hulk and Moses? Godzilla and Moses?

Get our point? Moses can take care of anything that gets in his way. So what better character to make into an action figure toy.

It's cheap, it's Biblical, and it's more fun than a golden calf!

.........................
sigh. goodnight.